Looking at ADHD differently, part 6

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this is another video still of me, Woolly, talking about Hat design, sat within my studio. With the Construct Hat in hand, I'm engagingly looking direct at the camera. I chose this shot because I look determined.

Here's the next post in my series for #ADHDAwareness month where I try and look at the condition I live with through the lens of my work.

For years I listened to folks telling me what to do because I kept trying new things, changing my mind, & that meant I needed direction, right? I'd always been told that my efforts weren't good enough; that no-one does it my way, I should do it this or that way. That I should settle down & make up my mind.

This is really common for ADHD folk. We don't change our minds because we're wrong, we change our minds because something new caught our attention. Every single one of us has been scolded for our inconsistency or changeability. It wears us down. Shame builds up, self-confidence perishes. We no longer trust ourselves. And in turn, we end up taking a lot of wrong paths because we try to conform to a norm that wasn't built with us in mind.

This isn't exclusive to growing up, I've experienced it as an adult, in this industry too. There was a period 5 or 6 years ago when I almost left Hat design because I wasn't enjoying it any more. The amount of helpful 'suggestions' I've received over my 16 years of publishing patterns would surprise you. No doubt folks meant well but to me they were just another person saying I couldn't be trusted.

It took a long time to distance myself from the folk who thought they knew best. I allowed myself to indulge in doing what I really enjoyed doing, then I did it some more. Before long I was loving my work again; my turnover & confidence grew.

Things changed with the Circled collection, then came Elemental. I hyper-focused & published successful collection after successful collection. My sideways designs hadn't been selling up to that point, which always saddened me, but now they were my best sellers.

Like Autistics, ADHD folk can hyper-focus. We also have special interests, though we may cycle through them quicker. There are layers to my special interests 'cos I'm ADHD & Autistic. I'll deep-dive on a 5 Hat collection then switch to a completely different idea & still stay within my special interest. It took 45 years of struggling to learn that my way is absolutely OK.

It really is time for the normative idea that we should settle down, that we should do what's expected of us, to get in the sea. Same goes for unsolicited advice.